Are you dreading a high-stakes meeting or an awkward conversation? I'm not, because I'm a craven coward who has dodged such unpleasantness for years.
If only I had a "power phrase" to activate, maybe things would have been different. That's the advice from psychotherapist Amy Morin for dealing with sticky situations.
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Morin, author of The Mental Strength Playbook, explained in Business Insider that a "short, positive sentence you say to yourself in the moment" is an effective two-minute cognitive reset.
She used hers while answering challenging questions to land her book deal: "I activated my power phrase and told myself, I'm a strong, straightforward communicator."
Cynics might pull a face and find the concept cringey. Why not stand in a power pose while you're at it?
They might also suggest it sounds like a rebranding of "giving yourself a little talking-to" – something everyone does in stressful situations, unless you are the kind of sublimely nonchalant, confident superhuman who thrives on pressure.
But simple and cringey can be effective. Morin points to a study suggesting positive self-affirmations can help people solve problems under pressure.
Another study indicates they activate reward and "self-processing" systems in the brain and can lead to behavioral change.
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When I absolutely must do something difficult, my pep talk traditionally inclines towards negging – "Just do it, you spineless worm" – or nihilism.
"It doesn't matter, you'll be dead soon," isn't obviously inspirational, but I find it obscurely comforting.
I have, however, been haunted in recent months by the wise thinker Oliver Burkeman's mantra for people daunted by change or the prospect of working on themselves.
We need to ask ourselves, Burkeman says, "How's that working out for you?"
"Not great" is the answer, I suppose: I've avoided challenging myself for so long I now dread stuff as pathetic as returning defective trousers or overhearing my husband have a hard phone conversation.
It's no way to live, so maybe I do, in fact, need a proper, positive power phrase.
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Let's try it out: "I am a reliable, competent writer and I can finish this column." Wow, it works!
